Unanswered Bookish Questions! (So Basically ENDLESS AGONY)

The side effect of reading is curiosity. And the side effect of curiosity is UN-ENDING AGONY BECAUSE NO ONE CARES.

(Except Google. Google cares.)

So here’s a list, a short one, mind you. It tells of all the unaswered bookish questions a bookish person might have. Specifically me. 

However, it doesn’t have a single answer. Because LOL I DON’T KNOW EITHER.

  • Where is old book perfume? How do I buy old book perfume? OLD BOOK PERFUME???
  • Why is it that I spend more on bookmarks than Kim Kardashian does on earrings and yet every time I need to stop reading, an old receipt/a pen/a banana/a decaying body ends up between my pages instead?
  • How to kill reading slump except without violence or any movement because lol all I want to do is take a nap? How?
  • How to host funerals for fictional characters?
  • How to track down authors and force answers to unanswered questions out of their smug little mouths?
  • How to eat Nutella and also read? Without apocalyptic mess??
  • How to make a book a personal pet? What food does it need? Is a cage required?
  • How to make a dress out of books? 
  • How to not get arrested for stealing books?
  • Are dead fictional characters in heaven?
  • Can I make my dog eat read books?
  • Are books tasty? Or should I add whipped cream?
  • How to memorize my favorite books? All the words? All of them?


Do YOU have answers to any of these questions? TELL ME, CHUMS! I NEED CLOSURE! How many bookmarks do you have? Do you read and eat or have you given up? Have you trained your dog to read?

Bookish Conversation Starters For the Bookishly Challenged

Here’s how friendship works in the bookish world:

You read books.

I read books. 

LET’S BE FRIENDS.

It’s a trick sort of logic but it works. Now, if you happened to be born without the literary gene, befriending a bookworm may turn out to be particularly tricky. Fret not, chums. I’ve got you covered.

 

  • How does one read?
  • Can you recommend any books for people into insert interest here?
  • Oh my gosh! That book cover is so pretty! If you were to design a book cover what would it look like?
  • I love that bracelet! What book inspired it? Did you make it?
  • I break the spines of all the books I read. (This will get a conversation going, but certainly not a friendship)
  • Do you like writing?
  • Oh, what’s NaNoWriMo? Can I join?
  • Do you want some bookish candy? (The answer is yes. Do not even ask this question. It’s redundant)
  • So what couples do you ship the most?
  • What do you want for your birthday? (GUESS WHAT IT IS BOOKS)
  • Where do you get all your bookish merchandise?
  • Can you recommend me a monthly bookish subscription box?
  • What are your bookish role models?
  • What book got you into reading? WAS YOUR LIFE EVER THE SAME? (Nope. The answer is nope.)
  • Wow, so what are your favorite booktubers and book bloggers?
  • Hey, should I check out Becca and Books? (Ahem. Yes.)

I hope that helped, my lovely little book-virgins. Ask me any of the questions above, let’s get the conversation flowing!